Home > love, remember > Je me souviens

Je me souviens

Monday, April 25, 2011, 07:05 EDT Leave a comment Go to comments

Heart rockThirty years ago today, a visitor from hundreds of miles away walked into my house and into my heart. It was a life-changing moment, and I remember it as if it were yesterday. I remember…

…the first glance…going downstairs for a drink of water hoping to see him, and I did…watching him sing…The Impossible Dream…ice cream sundaes at Friendly’s…

…how nervous I was the first time I wrote to him…the excitement of his first call…the red rose he sent me on graduation day…the incredible airport kiss…the first time he said “I love you”…standing on the bridge at the botanical gardens…waiting outside his building after work…our nightclub date…

…running into his arms in the Field House concourse…our first time…hearing him fight, fight, fight for the blue and white at the holiday tournament…the reservoir…so many moments on the Cape…the living room rug…his university pin…

…winter walks around his campus…saying good-bye…crying myself to sleep…hurting at weddings…wondering if he ever thought of me…a surprise email and Betsy Somebody…trying to let go…

…the sound of his voice after all those years…finding out he never let go, either…learning all about the kids…healing old wounds…pinning and the sonar tone…his miracle post…looking at houses online…dropping the envelope in his mailbox…embracing at the hotel…talking and listening and laughing and crying.

I remember all of it and more. But I don’t remember how to live without him.

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